BLOG: Being a Staff Carer at Queen's - My Experience
“CONNECT [carers network] is all set up to be supportive; it's fun, and the people are all nice, so I'd say to anyone that you'd be glad you've joined.”
A blog by Tom Dore, Digital Learning Officer, Engineering and Physical Sciences Faculty Office.
I'm a 'Digital Learning Officer', which entails assisting the teaching staff to adopt digital tools, starting with Canvas, then Teams during coronavirus, now Panopto; and also investigating other digital developments that may assist us; AI being the most obvious example now.
I go to the gym, and have recently started cycling and climbing, which I haven't done for a long time; this time for practical reasons (the car broke, and I've got a tree that I need to tackle). I also attend a church group, which may be handy now, to pray that I don't have an accident in traffic or at a height!
My mum has Alzheimer's. I live with her and take care of things, but she is still pretty okay; for example, she is able to attend a day centre, which she loves. I had also been caring for my dad over the whole time that I've been working in Queens (five+ years), until this Easter. In his case, arthritis limited his mobility, so it was about getting things for him - he couldn't get something if it dropped to the floor - or helping him get to things, as he couldn't get himself wholly into a car.
Caring has added extra appointments which I need to attend in the daytime, to ensure mum gets there and back, and to take any instructions on board.
My manager has been very supportive, as have the other people in the rest of the line management. They allow me flexibility when needed and have been encouraging.
I was intrigued to find out if I could learn something about what was going to happen with mum, as I didn't know much about Alzheimer's and how it would progress. Through the CONNECT network I did find out about an event in Fitzroy church (near the campus) at which I met a 'dementia navigator' who came and met mum and suggested that she could attend a day centre. It was great that they arranged for her to attend it, as she loves going there, meeting others, doing activities – it gives her social connections and purpose, just like going to work.
In CONNECT there are the opportunities for fortuitous discoveries, which can make a difference, as I found. There are also opportunities to hear from others and to realise that the struggles are mirrored, even if in different formats; and those chances to meet others are social, you only need to turn up, enjoy the snacks or food (the regular coffee mornings are great).
It is well known that the majority of carers out there are women and the CONNECT group is mostly made up of females. Maybe women will more readily talk face to face, whereas many men seem to prefer to interact 'shoulder to shoulder', i.e. whilst taking part in an activity. For CONNECT, in the future, it would be great to see if organising an activity such as gardening or archery would encourage more male staff carers to join and get involved.
In any case, CONNECT is all set up to be supportive; it's fun, and the people are all nice, so I'd say to anyone that you'd be glad you've joined.
FIND OUT MORE
CONNECT (Caring for Others Network - Nurturing, Empowering and Communicating Together) meets regularly either in person or via Teams. It provides an opportunity for staff to socialise and seek advice from colleagues who have lived experience of the issues they are facing.
